In the case of a person who says that he is not aware of his limits and does not know whether he wishes to be affected or not in the pubic area, he may be offered to close his eyes and take the time to feel how this perspective resonates in three different places of his body, if it sounds right for his head (the mind), for his heart (the emotional) and for his lower abdomen (the instinctive). And if one of these three poles gets tense at the idea that the pubic area is affected, this limit must be heard and respected.
- The idea is certainly not to see women as small fragile things and to comfort them in a victim status. On the contrary, by giving them time to become aware of what is right for them and by offering them the space to put it down, it invites them to reconnect to their own power.
The nudity of the person being massaged
The question of the nudity of the person being massaged is another opportunity to test its limits.It is customary for tantric massage to be received in nudity. This nudity has a real meaning in this globalizing and harmonizing massage where all parts of the body can be approached with respect, honor and simplicity.
Always optional nudity
However, this nudity is in no way an obligation and the massage will retain its tantric quality even though the person would keep an undergarment. Do not listen to the peremptory claims that a tantric massage must necessarily be received naked to be worthy of the name.
Indeed, it can be very confronting for some people to strip naked in front of a stranger and it makes no sense to force yourself to be naked if it is to stay tense during the massage and keep it a traumatic memory. It is better to keep an undergarment and be able to relax during the massage, even if it means evolving on this point during a later session, once confidence has been firmly established.
It is of course not always easy for the accompanying person to perceive how far it is right and beneficial to invite the person to go out of their comfort zone a little and the limit beyond which they are not good to go. The desire to see his client progress and evolve can sometimes encourage him to want to force things a little and not take enough account of the desirable rhythm.
This same perception of the limit is not always simpler for the massaged person who, too, does not necessarily distinguish well the nature of his reluctance to nudity.
Listen to your reluctance
If the caregiver perceives a hesitation on the part of his client, the best he can do is to invite him to take the time to feel what is the message that this reluctance has come to deliver to him and if it is right to override it or not. Thus, wanting to please the accompanying person, being in the norm or “not doing his prude” should not constitute sufficient reason to silence his reluctance.Often, a hesitation simply masks a little assumed “no” that it is good to be able to reaffirm with more assertiveness.